Malabo
Several times did I ask myself if I should be regretful or not, for so many things that I do not intend to look back. It was as if I was caught in between so many thoughts that somehow have manipulated me for so long or that is currently manipulating me. Even at this very moment of siesta hour in the office, where all I could do is either continue my project or continue my project, still I feel like I am getting too far yet so near. The former would definitely make things easier and faster but the latter would make things better but longer. Damn, as I always tell myself, I am getting nuts with these crazy stuff.
Life is different inside the Union Bank Plaza. It was really far different from what I used to be into, the ateneo campus. I've got limited friends, more silent times, less happy moments. But seriously, I am just so thankful that I was able to deviate from my "normal" life in school. I'm growing, as my officemates would always say.
The only hard thing was, I never realized that it was not going to be that easy. I thought that this summer is going to be less hassle for me since there are only two courses that I'll be worrying about and take note that these courses don't have exams, quizzes, etc. Just requirements that are actually the ones making my life worse along with my extracurricular works. Yeah, workssss.
(Haha, I am not whining. I am just making a deep reflection about life and here ye't is!)
With all the sudden pressure that I am experiencing, I begin to realize things which are not concerned with the present but of the future. The what if's of an adult Christian Robert C. Canlas. I know that I have already thought of these things back then but right now, it's different. It's more serious, really serious.
I guess the best way to put it is through a fire alarm. Imagine yourself being trapped in a building caught on fire and all you could hear are the burning walls, exploding computers and other electronics, and the sound of a really panic"-able" fire alarm and at any second, you will die out of suffocation. Gee, that's too advance and harsh. I don't know, paranoid lang siguro ako.
Anyway, pagod lang siguro ito. Tomorrow's our graduation but I am not excited since I will be delivering a speech (damn), I will have to extend until next week to finish my paper on bonds and I will have to wait for another two weeks to receive our below-the-minimum allowance. Now, I am ranting.
Ciao ciao. Need to get back to work.
2:00 PM
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Bittersweetness
It was my mom's day yesterday but how unkind of me that I spent the whole day in front of the computer, doing nothing but the first half of our critique. 'T was exaggerated maybe, but I know that we're all aware of how Tv can shift our attention, especially when I saw the new soap debut presentation, and, of course, who could repel the YM temptations. Yeah. Or maybe I should thank Caloy for making me feel its (yes, bcoz it's a typhoon) cold-relaxing breeze that almost made me fall asleep.
If you could only imagine how chaotic that day was for me and how regretful I have been for taking a lot of things for granted. But it's over, at least. It may have been gloomy, after all the down moments, contemplations and goodbyes but luckily, there were the happy ones that somehow pulled it off, especially the red spaghetti that paved way to a good, peaceful sleep.
How can I not mention the realizations that every tick of the clock has brought my heart. One is on how effective can tears and laughter make life less complicated. I tell you, it is!! Another is on how can things go inevitable all of a sudden, that will make you panic as if it's the end of the world. So act as early as now. And the most important of all, I guess, is that I have realized that bittersweetness, indeed, have a good after taste.
Let's make our lives less complicated.
Gee, I am already saying nonsense things here. Ciao.
7:17 PM
Monday, May 15, 2006
Just an Update
It's been a while since my last post. Gee, imagine, I got too preoccupied by a lot of things. And I have to make a clarification, yes, I am currently having my internship at Union Bank and at the same time, attending an eco class firstly in the morning. I wake up around 6:00-6:30am, go home around 10pm and sleep around 12midnight.
I am not really sure if I should be regretful for advancing a free elective course or just merely choosing the best and worthwhile M&B class. Shit. I am just thankful for UB for making my summer an extra fun.
Right now, I feel like I am losing my sight after missing several things that have briefly surpassed my awareness. I can still feel the breeze that Pampanga has left me with, the poison that has nearly wrecked my sanity, and something I don't want to know. In exchange for this was provided by my beloved Union Bank family (who, for some, never had been) like its merger with iBank.
There were so many things that I want to rant about, but it's not worth it.
Thanks to those messages that somehow pushed me to come up with this one. =)
2:09 PM
Thursday, May 11, 2006
