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A Dispatch


Dear Twenty,

How are you? I know that you can hardly wait ‘til we meet each other. At the moment, I am having fun with Nineteen. She seems to be really nice since gifts don’t seem to stop pouring up to this very hour. Ms. Nicole David and Ms. Patricia Gonzales should be remembered for this. Even though I had a bad exam with Differential Equations early this morning, and I have two long tests coming up for the rest of this week, don’t worry because I am really having a great time. So don’t rush this early. Relax.

Thank God, I am over with Eighteen.

Signed by me.
______________________
**Life’s ironically damn great!

11:14 PM
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
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My 19th 21st!


I couldn’t really find time to compose an entry nowadays. Aside from the frenzied everyday life that I have in school, I am also having this chaotic lifestyle at home. There’s so many things I want to do but 24 hours don’t seem enough. Anyway, if it’s not only my birthday, then most probably I wouldn’t care composing this one.

Enough of the rants.

Yey, finally, I’m 19.
And I want to thank the following people who welcomed me and be with me as I kicked off my last teenage year. Within the first minutes, there’s Rach, Toni, Patty, Hansel, Chel (my birthday bud); Within the first 6 hours, there’s Mark Eds and Yahoo; Within the day, there’s Niki, Abi, Clang, Steph, Joy, Birch, Lou and Joyce; Those who were late, like Concon, Lizet, Jelline, Wamar, J-M and Carlos. And of course, the earliest among everyone who greeted me days before my birthday, Sheryl. To those who I missed to write here, you just know who you are… Thanks!

Super thanks to you guys.

I also would like to thank Philo for making me stay awake until 6:00AM on my birthday. To Aghamon, for making me spend my birthday with the brightest students of Metro Manila, and of course, I would like to thank my bed for giving me the best sleep of my life, for the 16-straight-hour sleep.

Also, thanks to Abi for the Starbucks Gift Check, Bench Shirt and the Interview tips-sheet. Thanks to Adri, for the delayed but super-timely belated Christmas gift – Adidas perfume. Thanks to Mal, for the grandest gift I have received, a jumbo Cadbury Fruits and Nut Chocolate bar! Even if it’s 2 days late, well, you’ve just made me so happy Lering! Damn, you’re so great! Thanks!



Now, I will go to sleep messed with chocolate melts. Yummy!

11:18 PM
Monday, January 23, 2006
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Friday the 13th


I was on my way to school when all of a sudden I have noticed that people are wearing black shirts. Exaggerated maybe but I really couldn’t help thinking about it. Oh well, maybe it was just due to my morning illness. Yes, I had to cut my first class coz I was not really feeling well. It was only when I got to school that I have realized that it’s Friday the thirteenth. Darn.

It’s quite interesting to note that this is the 2nd Friday the thirteenth this school year. Thank God, I have taken note of the cacophonous day that was. So I had to somehow reminisce a bit and see if there’s an awkward similarity.

Here's what I have written on the 13th of May, 2005, Friday.

Darn. O. M. G.
I was not able to update my blog this week, got sleepy in most of my classes. Quite the same, but some things were somehow altered a bit. First, although I never had a quiz today, I had a graded recitation and I barely got a 2.5, which is also half-way mark (meaning, it’s like the 5/10 since in our philo recitation, we’re just being given either a 4.0, 2.5, or a 0.0). Second, I saw an angel, the most amazing angel that I have seen. Ewan ko ba, these days, I used to see her everyday. Third, I wasn’t late for my first class, but I was absent. Fourth, nothing seemed to be depressing today since I became so productive, in a way. I’m not expecting any exam but a paper. Fifth, I was never as parsimonious today (oooh, I’m becoming a
sesquipedalian blogger!). Then blah blah… And lastly, I have to be in school tomorrow for three things: One, I have to go to the Lib and research. Two, I have to attend the Ateneo HS Math Club project since we’re giving a talk about our home org. Third, I have to go to Nikki’s house and finish our histo paper.

Well, I may not look so busy but to tell you, damn, my first hell week this year will be on the week of my birthday. Argh. But looking on the brighter side, I guess, it’s just a good way of kicking off my last teenage year. Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!

You’re just too obvious. I understand you. Well, it’s my fault. You’re naiilang, and I know it’s not getting any better. Maybe I should set some distance in order to help you cope with it, and ease the ilang feeling. Well, I guess, things will never be same again. It’s just so sad to think, but I guess I have to accept the consequences of my actions. Again, I am so sorry for breaking your trust, and for ruining our good friendship.

A sesquipedalian ass, rather.

"When all is said and done, more is said than done."


10:54 PM
Friday, January 13, 2006
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A Mediocre Day


This morning, to my astonishment, I found myself occupying someone else’s bed. I can still feel the Jerbaxx spirit running through my veins, invading all the sanity in me. I've held my head, relieving the headache and trying to remember last night’s memories. Oh, yeah, it was Kuya Moi’s birthday party last night. Should I blame Kaye for introducing me this kind of demonic drink? Nah, at least I was able to meet new great friends, Ria and Diana. The night must have been so harsh, at the peak of emotions. Thanks, Mal, for wasting your time hearing all of my nonsense rants.

Oh well, I just miss the days.


Cousins... asteeg!


4:53 PM
Sunday, January 08, 2006
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Triotic Night Out


I could call it a night after I spent my 6 hours with two of my best buds, Jelline and Heindrick. Thanks to you guys. We’re supposed to hangout as a block at Drew's but for some weird reasons, we’re down to three and we ended up at Heindrick's place. Whew, what a trio chaotic night out. Yeah, it has been one hell of an incredible night for the three of us. Well, now I must say that quality should never be jeopardized with quantity.

Thanks to Mcdo, Nova, Chabi, 7-11, RH (3 1000ml!), Nagaraya, Oishi, and Piatos. Damn, how on earth was I able to take note of these to think that I have just gone home, quite… you know.

Well, it must have been because of our need to take a break. Yeah, I have been so stupid for being so paranoid with the line “We’re okay.” Well, I misinterpreted it out of paranoia and stupidity. Damn, what an MTO. Shit.

But still, I can’t let you go out of my head.

Damn, I am such a pain in the ass. No matter how I hate myself for being so irritating and annoying, the fact that I am aware of it, I couldn't really help it and that's the damn worst thing of all.

Forgive me for being such a ludicrous brat.

11:59 PM
Friday, January 06, 2006
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Whew… it’s 06 at Last!


How can I miss the first five days of this year without a single entry? Damn, it’s sooo weird. Oh well, I guess, that’s a good way for me to kick off this year, as I look forward to this incredible roller-coaster year.

I’ve gone too busy daydreaming lately. I’ve been engulfed by such complicated ideas, things that you could never imagine. Oh well, it’s kinda over, at least.

Yeah, I gave it an imprudent blast.

It has served its purpose, I hope. I don’t know if I’m speaking in behalf of a sarcastic remark but, I guess, what I did is the right thing. To think that I have had it hidden for more than a year, who could have thought of slipping it abruptly and foolishly? Damn, I deserve a slap on my face. Wake up, wake up you silly boy!

I’ve had to let it go, not for the sake of acquiring something but for the sole purpose of closing this chapter of my life. I know it has been so strange but I just couldn’t help saying it. I’ve been too daft, harsh and egotistic on you, that I couldn’t forgive myself for giving you such a hassle. And for everything I have caused you, it would be my apology.

Oh, there’s one more thing…

I really adore you for no specific reason. And that I can never bring to a halt. You’d better kill me for this. Thanks for being so kind and beautiful.

Damn, I’ve gone a way too off. What an entry, the first for this year.
Whew… anyway, it’s 06, finally.


I have thought of changing my form of writing into something I can hardly think of but, I guess, it won’t do anything good in bringing the cacophony out of me. So I might as well do whatever I want to, since in some better ways, this serves as a relief. Whew…




6:47 PM
Thursday, January 05, 2006
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capture the cacophony

I am XIANXU
20yo Mafin Grad
loves Ateneo.
hates oral exams.
likes fruits.
dislikes cooked fruits.
likes photography.
hates my photos.
loves sadness.
hates happiness.
loves philo.
loves math.
loves writing.
loves love.
loves you.
loves nothing
welcome to my Cacophony!

shit it out U





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