Haunting Sipnayan
Haaayyyy...
Today was really a blast!
I was the quizmaster for the Sipnayan Gradeschool. Although I didn't prepare much, I guess I did pretty good.But there has been a complaint made by one of the teachers from one of the school participants. I had committed a mistake acknowledging"daw" a team which got the correct answer. Well, I really saw an "80" on their board but some people said I said "8." Oh well, who knows? This doesn't just end with it. The student from that team admitted "daw" according to the mother, that their answer was really "8" and this intensified the situation. But nobody can tell, what if they've written 80 instead of 8? I believe that I really saw an "80." Or I should have my eyes check na with an opta.
Anyway, it already happened. Although it seems so bad, yeah really is, since two mothers approached me and pointed on me, blaming me for such mistake that I was not sure, I don't feel much of the guilt except for the kids who approached me. Although they seemed to be fit, but I am sure that they felt bad about it and I am very sorry to them. Anyway, their school didn't make it to the finals. And that shows, I guess, or that was already affected by what happened?
Oh no... It seems to us that Sipnayan is haunting me with such memorable experiences. Every sipnayan, like last year when I became sabog, there is always this highlight that we can't forget and I am always there. Is this a curse? Oh no but I don't think so.
Anyway, it was also Toni's birthday celebration. Haha. Super fun coz we ate a lot of her winner spaghetti! Yehey! I ate so much kaya siguro nahilo ako after, kasi I was not able to eat well during luncheon.
I went home, wearing the semi-formal attire. Oh well, I was really feeling so tired and exhausted on my way home. I had to stop at Mcdo for a while and rest while waiting for my bestie, Kristina, coz we're about to meet that time (kanina). After an hour, she replied that she's already home. Whew... Buti nalang I saw Mac and at least I have someone to talk to. He was one of the tnt alumni who made a talk last time. Afterwards, I went home. Ate. Slept for 5 hours.
Now, time check: 3:00AM, I woke up to start this hell week to come right.
I wish that Ninoy would remembered, celebrated and declared a holiday on Monday.
GMA.... please.
11:24 PM
Saturday, August 20, 2005
Starving to Death
This day has been so dull. I woke up early but I left my bed late. Argh. I spent time with my family, particularly to my mom, and we talked about some matters regarding the community. I went to school, nothing unusual. I attended my first class every TTH, which is International Economics. Again, the usual daily scenario but it's quite unusual that I stared at Kuya Mark's watch. Kuya Mark is my seatmate. Kuya coz he was a batch higher, or rather im in a senior's class. Then came the highlight for the day: The Ma195a class or the Numerical Analysis class.
Isasalin ko na sa salitang tagalog ang sasabihin ko tungkol sa nangyari sa klase kanina kasi isa siyang dayuhan at baka mabasa nya pa itong dyornal ko at malagot pa ako sa kanya. Magaling kasi siya sa komputer. Pero sa totoo lang, hindi ko alam ang pakiramdam nang umiyak ang guro namin (siya) sa harap namin. Nakita ko sa kanya na hirap na hirap na syang turuan kami. Kasi ba naman, ang gulo nya talaga magturo. Ayokong sabihin na kasi dayuhan pero nasabi ko na. Haha. Hayun, humagulgol sya pero ok lang. Nakakatawa pero hindi ako natawa kasi nandun pa rin ang sama ng loob ko sa kanya. Kaya siguro hindi ako maawa-awa. Tapos, napapansin ko rin na parang galit sya sa akin, pero baka may iba pa syang kagalit. Ewan ko ba sa kanya. Bahala na, basta ako, may sarili akong mundo. Gagawin ko ang dapat ko na lang gawin. Kainis.
Then, the bell rang but Toni spent the remaining time to do her notes and I waited for her. We left after around an hour. I was already starving at this moment. We walked through the SEC WALK. We've met a lot of friends whom I no longer wanted to discuss here. It's our moment. Haha. I left Toni at Matteo coz I am already starving to death but I have had problems along the way. I did some community work (for her) where I asked people to sign something. And I met Che, my blockmate. I was saddened by the fact that the list was not yet accomplished. I've asked her last saturday to talk to her core about the list, which the sponsor is asking from me, and email it to me by monday. It's now thursday and finally, she emailed it na. Yun nga lang, email. I haven't eaten anything today. I have received a bad text from the sponsor yesterday asking for the list. And now I am fixing the contact list. Why do I have to accomplish this. Oh well, coz they can't do it. Pending works. Argh. Hindi na nila naisip kung gaano ka-importante ang sponsors. Nagpakahirap na nga kami tapos masisira lang sa kaka-postpone at kaka-promise. Nakakahiya kasi sa sponsors. Ano nalang ang sasabihin nito sa work ethics namin? Kaya heto, ako nalang ang magpi-print. Kung hindi pa sila i-text, hindi pa nila maaalala. I have reminded them, paulit-ulit last saturday pero walang nangyari. Grr. Nakakainis talaga. Tapos, inopen ko nga yung file nila, kelangan ko pang i-edit kasi may telephone numbers. Hindi ko talaga alam... GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!
Pero okay lang. Tapos na eh. Ang importante magawa ko to. I felt so martyr kasi I'm sacrificing a lot. I'm starving but here I am, doing their work. Oh well. Sorry nalang sa kanila. Gutom lang ako today kaya kung anu-ano na ang nasasabi ko. GUTOM NA AKO!
11:21 PM
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Closing the FinMan Day
This day has been a so-so day.
I was late for my Sci10 class. Got a 1/5-quiz. Argh. Missed the bonus item. Argh. I was the lowest among the three of us, my dear blockmates. Malerie arrived after me, actually she arrived when the quiz's over. Actually, she's lucky coz the papers were not yet passed so she was able to accomplish her quiz. She got a 2 out of 5. Argh.
I arrived on time with Winningwoes' class but I got a BIG FAT X. Oh no. I didn't have a homework absent for the lame reason that I was absent last friday. Grr.
It was in philo class that I was enlightened. Seated next to Niki, we became so interested with our topic for the day: Pag-uulit ayon kay K at H. It was fun, and I was able to relate some of my experiences to it. It's complicated so I'd rather not discuss it here. Basta kailangan kong magsagawa ng pag-uulit!
After Philo, Niki and I rushed to the bank, and went to UP. We've attempted to visit our dear UP fellows but we failed, we found noone around. So we just had our merienda. We bought big pieces of hot Monay. I drank C2, while I bought her a shake.
We drove to BA bldg. but we never found our BA friends.
We've tried to visit Kaye, but she's busy. Maybe next time.
Then I went back to school for my Finance class and some appointments.
...
Our finance class has never been so boring. I felt so dumb coz I can no longer understand what my teacher was discussing. Bonds, James Bond, Bonds, Assets Valuation, Bonds Valuation, Bonds, Stocks, Stocks Valuation... Argh, concepts kept on circling in my head. Thanks to Aya, my dearest seatmate, coz we were both having fun discussing a more relavant topic, for us. Haha. Haha. Our dear favorite course. Haha.
FinMan class ended, I with much nothing learned.
On my way home, I have met a bunch of coniotic creatures.
It was so antagonizing that they speak this accent. Yikes. But they seem so funny. Haha.
Then, I have arrived home. Finally. Researching for our Sci10 report.
Closing the FinMan day didn't give me much of a satisfaction. Argh.
11:18 PM
Monday, August 15, 2005
Busy and Lousy Sunday Afternoon
It's sunday.
I've planned to wake up at around 3am but I failed. I really don't have a word to myself.
Pasaway.
But above these, there's something good that happened before I sleep. I have straightened things up last night. I have reconciled with some of my friends. I made some confession, some mushy stuff. Oh well, it feels great. Mabait ulet ako.
I woke up late the for the mass so I went back to sleep. That was around 8:30am. I rose from bed past 10am. What did I do? Tumunganga and busily texting people.
I planned to start studying after lunch. We ate but I didn't study, until now. Grr.
I still have a lot of pending work. We have a group report this wednesday for Sci 10. Then, I still have to read my finman book. I'm three chapters behind! Grabe! I have a lot of extra-curricular work. Grr pero fun naman.
This has been a busy and lousy Sunday, but the point is, I was able to take a break from everything. Thank God.
11:15 PM
Sunday, August 14, 2005
Indifference
It's Camp Math Day.
I went to school today. But instead of going to the library and study, I've devoted my time with AMS, because it's Camp Math day. I played bridge with my friends. I spent some time with my blockmates. The only thing that I regret the most was the time I wasted with someone who is accusing me of ruining his life. And I don't intend to bring it up here, coz it's basically a waste of time.
I had fun with the campers. We had a GD called "Reverse Charade." It's fun but I found myself so drained when I went to UP to see my bestie.
I rode the UP jeep to MassComm Bldg. I was caught by her tantalizing beauty. She was wearing this short skirt, and a revealing top. Haha. Her name's Kristina, my bestfriend. We took the opportunity of spending some time with each other. We've talked about her life, her life engulfed with this guy’s evil realm. Yes, EVIL. I don't know what to feel actually. There were guilt, hatred and pity that I felt while talking to her. It was such a different feeling. I was so tired then, but I managed to talk to her.
Around 6:30, we ate at Mcdo. We met Abi and her friend, Ehm. They talked as if they've never seen each other for a long long time.
We left around 7:00. They're going to their org's acquaintance party. We took a cab and I got off beneath the overpass. Then I went home.
Now, I am online without much in mind.
I am feeling tired, still. It was such a very long day. I've once again let things pile up. Now, another tiring night and bet it's going to be a busy Sunday. Busy weekend. Whew.
11:07 PM
Saturday, August 13, 2005
Drama King Philosophizing
Grrrrr.
Nakakainis.
Sobrang nakakainis.
Ewan.
Ang OA.
Palagi nalang kasi mali.
Hindi kayo marunong umunawa.
Pakiramdam n'yo, kayo ang laging tama.
Sino nagsabi? Edi kayo rin.
Ang masama pa nito, wala na kaming karapatan magsalita.
Ano 'to, Martial Law?
Tapos, kapag naninindigan kami sa aming mga paa, labis n'yong dinaramdam. Nagpapaka-OA na kayo. Kung anu-ano ang sinasabi. At iyon ang nakakakainis. OO... ako rin. Maraming hinanakit. Hinanakit na pinagtagpi-tagpi ng panahon.Nagrerebelde na ako. Gusto ko ng pagbabago. May katiwalian.
Sa pagiging OA, marami kayong sinasabi. Hindi pinag-iisipan kung maganda pa ba ang sinasabi. Wala kayong iniisip, basta masabi n'yo lang ang gusto n'yong sabihin, masaya na kayo. Kami, ayun, nabingi at naiinis. Patuloy na naiinis. Sa paulit-ulit na ganito, nabubuo ang hinanakit na ito. Na dadalhin ko habang panahon.
OO... masama na kung masama. Manhid na ako minsan. Totoo, sana ay nagkandamatay na noong sanggol pa lamang. OO, sana nga!
Matagal ko nang gusto isulat ito, pero wala ako palagi sa timing, walang spice, walang emosyon. Buti nalang at may nangyari... ulet.
E anu ngayon kung napakasimple lang ng argumento ko? Ang simple at mumunti, maaaring makapagpasabog ng buong mundo.
OO... sinabi mo eh. Sinabi mo na 'yan ilang beses na. Wala na sigurong pagbabago. Pero ako, magbabago. Dahil gusto ko. Dahil ito ang itinuro n'yo sa akin.
Ngayon ay nauunawaan ko na rin. Dahil naranasan ko na. Sana lamang ay tingnan muna ang sarili bago ang iba. Dahil hindi maganda na nag-aaral ako tapos hindi ko nagagamit at taliwas pa ang nangyayari. Iyon ang bisa ng mahiwagang meron sa pilosopiya. Naninindigan ako, dahil sa tingin ko, ito ang tama. Pero hindi ibig sabihin noon na masama na ako, katulad ng sinasabi n'yo!
8:11 PM
Friday, August 12, 2005
